Hello

I’ve been meaning to start a blog for awhile, but a deadly cocktail of apathy and laziness prevented that from happening. Until now.

I am going to try to not make this one of those things where I make like three posts then abandon it forever, but if I’m being real with myself and the five people reading this, I’m probably going to make like three posts then abandon it forever. Sorry in advance.

Here’s what I can promise you: there will be grocery store content. What the fuck does that mean, you might be asking yourself. To know me is to know that I am fascinated with grocery stores. Watching someone grocery shop alone is like to peering into their soul. Ask yourself: are you the type of person will remorselessly cop a grape as you stroll down the produce aisle? Are you one of those psychos that has to feel every bell pepper eight times before finally picking one? And as you load your cart with Lil Bites chocolate chip muffins and Entenmann’s cheese danishes, do you do so with shame and indignity, or with your head held high? Important topics like these are what I aim to address in this blog. Also sports probably.

I named the blog after the 1984 film Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo. For like ten years I thought it was Dirty Dancing 2: Electric Boogaloo until one day I found out it was actually Dirty Dancing 2: Havana Nights, and, like John Nash in A Beautiful Mind, everything I thought I knew was suddenly called into question. As a means of coping I did a youtube deep dive on Breakin’ 2, and I was not disappointed. It was like shooting up pure 80’s directly into my bloodstream. The following clip is all you need to appreciate this timeless classic:

Leather. Breakdance battles. Sophisticated nunchuck choreography.

Need I say more?